Thursday, July 31, 2008

Holy Cow!

I have been trying to update you all! Every time I type out a post, I get "called" away and don't get it posted! I can not believe that it is Thursday already! Chrystal and Jeff came to visit for a few days so that Chrystal could take her nursing license exam. They left late last night. Today is "domestic" day which means I get to clean the apartment, do laundry and get myself organized. I had a not so pleasant run in with Comcast yesterday. (If there was anyway for me to get rid of Comcast I would do it in a heart beat!). This is going to be quick and short as I really need to get some things done, but I did want you to know that everything is going along fine here, I am looking forward to getting MUCH accomplished in August and hopefully I can get some fun stuff posted here for you all. Peace out.

Saturday, July 26, 2008


Summer classes are OVER! Yay me! Today Dave and I are going home to see the kids and go to my family reunion (I know, that is super cruel to do to him, but, well....) We will be home in the early evening tomorrow. I am trying to get ready, but I seem to have no motivation! I think that I would love to lay around and watch TV all day! Not happening, so I better get to it. I hope that you all have a wonderful weekend!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Nearly there!

Ok, so I spent the entire day yesterday (until 1am) finishing my research proposal and my presentation for today. I am up again to touch up the presentation and practice it a bit. I have class at 1pm and then THAT will be finished! Basically the research proposal that I wrote for this class is my research proposal for my dissertation. This of course means that it is only a "rough draft" . Since I am writing an individual fellowship grant to the NIH (National Institute of Health) to fund the final 3 years of my program, I need to clean that up in August. I also have another research proposal to write for my thesis which is something that doctoral candidates must also complete. (I am already working on that research!) So although I have no "class" in August, I still have MUCH to accomplish before the fall term begins. I VOW to keep up on this work and NOT wait until the last minute to complete it! :o)

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Why oh why!?

I swear I am the worst procrastinator ever in the world. It has a tendency to make me miserable so I have no idea WHY I do it. My last class meeting for the summer is Friday. I have a research proposal that is due for this class on Thursday night and a presentation on said proposal on Friday afternoon. I have been dragging my feet on this. I have a A+ in this class at this point, turning in a good product would go a long way in keeping that A+. So here I am, reading all of my favorite blogs and updating my own. :o)

Don't get me wrong, it is not as if I have done NOTHING about this, I have my lit review basically complete, I know exactly what I am doing as far as Null Hypothesis, purpose, etc. It is simply a matter of putting it all together. I have a few meetings tomorrow which will take up some of my time. I also have been selling shit on Ebay to make rent for August and have 5 huge boxes to ship. I also need to follow up on financial aid stuff that might bring me in a bit of cash to help with August bills.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Beautiful Love

Yesterday was one of the worst days of my life. Traveling is never fun, however anything that could go wrong, went wrong, and then some. Both of my flights were delayed for over an hour, the second one delayed prior to boarding and THEN AGAIN once we boarded. I put my bags under the seat, only to discover after I pulled them out and carried them, I had someone's chewed gum all over my bag AND my pants. It was horribly hot. I could go on, but you get the idea. Dave (formerly known as "the boy") was a bit frustrated with my poor attitude. By the time I arrived in Detroit I was a mess. It took the airline an entire hour to get our luggage on the turn-style (wtf?) Although we had decided that Dave wouldn't pick me up due to his crazy schedule, he knew I was in a bad state and called me to say he was on his way to get me. We arrived at my apartment and he said that I should go up and get settled while he ran to the store to get me a pack of smokes and some sangria. I was fully unsuspecting........I arrived at my door to find a red heart taped to the door. My first thought that it was my neighbor who I had given some art supplies to their children and it was a little thank you note. I removed the heart and opened the door......only to find red hearts taped to the walls throughout my entire apartment and red hearts hanging from the ceiling by white ribbons throughout the entire apartment. What an incredible feeling to know that someone loves me enough to take the time to do something so incredibly special. What a beautiful end to what was a horrible day! Someone loves me :o)

Saturday, July 19, 2008

All is well

My presentations went well, my paper was well received. Now I just have this evening the the day tomorrow to wait to board the plane. I wish I was going home tonight! I will use this time to work on my research proposal. I miss "the boy" extra lots and do not like this being apart 2 weekends in a row........:o(

I shouldn't goof around on here, I seriously need to work, so I am going to cut this short and say.....see you in a few!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Yale, Here I am!

Ok, so I am in New Haven CT at the famous Yale University. I am presenting a paper that I wrote this weekend at a conference. I was surprised by the city. It seems a little dirty. I was expecting it to be slightly different. Although the campus itself seems very reverent (similar to the UofM campus). The hotel that I am at is very nice, however for a 7 story hotel, ONE soda machine (that is out of order) hardly seems enough. I am dying for a soda, so I suppose I should go out and see if I can find a party store. *sigh*

I miss "the boy" (of course) and he seems sad without me there. :o(

Ok, I better go find a party store before it becomes too dangerous for me to be out on the streets!

More later!

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

A Survey

One of my favorite blogs Legal Goddesshad this survey up and since I love to avoid all things that I should be doing with things that I shouldn’t be doing…….

1. Do you like blue cheese salad dressing?
No, I prefer Fat free Raspberry vinaigrette
2. Have you ever smoked heroin?
Nope, nor have I smoked weed! (true story!)
3. Do you own a gun?
No and it is highly unlikely that I ever will.
4. Your favorite drink at Starbucks or other specialty?
Expresso Royale – Chai latte with soy (yummy!)
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
6. What do you think of hot dogs?
Very yummy, particularly with raw onions, cucumbers and celery salt!
7. Favorite Christmas song?
Silent Night
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Diet Pepsi (sorry!)
9. Can you do push ups?
If I can be on my knees
10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry?
Anything with my glass art!
11. Favorite hobby?
Glass art! (Haven’t melted glass in well over a year though!)
12. Do you have A.D.D.?
Apparently I do, I should have taken a ritalin, maybe then I would be writing a research proposal rather than typing this survey!
13. What’s one trait that you hate about yourself?
Wow, that is tough, I have grown to love what I used to hate. If I had to say something……I suppose my ability to see both sides of a situation can be annoying, sometimes I just want to be angry and have my way, but I easily can see the others point of view and tend to compromise far too easily!
14. Middle name?
Something very typical for my given name.
15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
1) I really should not be wasting time right now!
2) I wonder if I will get everything done on my list to do tomorrow!
3) I wish I had some ice cream in the freezer!

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink?
Diet Pepsi, water, margaritas!
17. Current worry right now?
Can I actually get both of these proposals written?
18. Current hate right now?
Summer Graduate Student Funding!
19. Favorite place to be?
Anywhere with “the boy”
20. How did you bring in the New Year?
Ummm, I don’t remember, I am fairly sure that I was asleep!
21. Like to travel?
22. Name three people who will complete this?
Not asking anyone to.
23. Do you own slippers?
Noooo….barefoot baby!
24. What color shirt are you wearing?
25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?
Yes :o)
26. Can you whistle?
27. Favorite color?
28. Would you be a pirate?
Not a chance
29. What songs do you sing in the shower?
I don’t sing in the shower, I do sing in the car though!
30. Favorite girl’s name?
31. Favorite boy’s name?
32. What’s in your pocket right now?
No pockets
33. Last thing that made you laugh?
“the boy”
34. Best bed sheets as a child?
Wow, hmm, I was lucky to have bed sheets!
35. Worst injury you’ve ever had?
Broken collar bone when I was 3
36. Do you love where you live?
Yes :o)
37. How many TVs do you have in your house?
Just 1, but when “the boy” moves in it is likely to increase exponentially to something like 4?
38. Who is your loudest friend?
No loud friends!
40. Does someone have a crush on you?
I hope so!
41. What is your favorite book?
Anything that isn’t a textbook!
42 What is your favorite candy?
43. Favorite Sports Team?
Michigan football! GO BLUE!
44. What were you doing 12 AM last night?
45. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning?
I would give anything to curl back up with “the Boy” and sleep some more

I am certain that is more about me than you cared to know.......:P


I am a bit backlogged on stuff. I have been listing stuff on Ebay to make a bit of cash. I leave Thursday to present my paper at Yale and will return late Sunday evening. I hope to have internet access, but I won't know until I get there. I of course will take homework with me and hope to have extra time to work on it. Since I am so poor right now, I don't have money to go do things while I am there, so I won't be getting out too much. I have a bizzilion things to do before I leave. July was suppose to be better (and it was) but not as good as I was hoping for. I DO hope that August is much more tame.

At this point in time "the boy" is planning to move in September 1st. It is a big decision for both of us, but in all honesty we are basically living together now, so why keep 2 apartments? His lease is up in August, so that is why we are looking towards September. I think it will be much easier to have more of a routine if we do this. At the moment everyday seems to get goofed up trying to mesh our 2 spaces, responsibilities etc. Certainly combining expenses will also be a big bonus. Every day that goes by, we become closer and love each other more. It feels right and good, so we are going with it!

Ok.....research proposal.....MUST. GET. DONE.

Sunday, July 13, 2008


Wow, I really enjoyed seeing the kids, it was the best time that we have had in a long time. The house is now spotless (for how long, who knows!) I really missed "the boy" and the best part was coming home. He is at work and I drove straight there and the got the best hug ever! Now I am home and need to do some intensive homework before "the boy" gets off work, at which time we are going out to dinner and sit and talk for the rest of the evening! (I can't wait!)

I am hoping that you all are having a wonderful end to your weekend!


Thursday, July 10, 2008

The good news and the bad news

The good news, I am back in Triple Creek to see the kiddies and it is totally awesome to see them. Really and Truly. I miss them tons.

The bad news, I miss "the boy" like, extra lots. He couldn't come with me and, well....damn I miss him!

Fortunately for me I have the kids and I can enjoy them for the next few days, and see my parents, etc. However, when I go home on Sunday, I think that I am going to be one happy girl to see "the boy"!

I promised the kids that I would clean the house for them, so that should be fun (not). I am planning to "work" tomorrow to make a bit of cash and Benjamin turns 21 on Sunday, so long about Midnight on Saturday night, I will be purchasing my baby boy's first legal drink. It should be a fun weekend, even though part of my heart is back in Ann Arbor with "the boy".

I do hope that you are all having an enjoyable weekend!

(Oh, PS, "the boy" and I are planning an 80's Prom RSVP if you would like to come!)

Should be......

Should be.....Could be.......I seriously need to get into a better routine. Things are beginning to fall through the cracks. It is funny, when I am in the midst of so much to do, planning how it is all going to get done can be helpful, however my plans are unrealistic, then I have this hope that I will have it all accomplished and have this free time, and when I don't follow "the plan" I then lose the free time that I was hoping for.......

Anyway, "the boy" told me yesterday that I am missing the Art Fair (it is the weekend that I will be at Yale) That was disappointing to find out. I had just moved to Ann Arbor (it will be one year exactly this coming Sunday) and the very next week was the art fair and Scott Squared came over and took me to the art fair (remember??) I was lost beyond belief anytime I went anywhere in this town for the first month I was here. Thankfully I know my way around now! I do love Ann Arbor though!

I am up early in hopes of accomplishing a few things before a 10am meeting. After that, I need to be VERY focused and accomplish a few more things. I am debating heavily with myself about when to drive home (home meaning the kids in TR). I really should go tonight, which gives me the entire day tomorrow, however, I am not sure that I can or should. I haven't seen "the boy" much in the last week (I basically see him everyday, but we have not had much time together) So I hesitate to leave tonight, knowing that if I waited to leave until the morning tomorrow, I would probably have this evening to spend with "the boy". Meh. We will see.

Alrighty.......time to do something to accomplish something........:o) Peace out!

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Where does it go?

The time.....where does it go? Suddenly it is nearly the middle of July! That really amazes me!

I have data to enter into data bases for the research that I am working on, but first I need to race through the apartment and clean! I have not cleaned this place for weeks! (that sounds bad, but I am not that dirty, I can just see the dust and just knowing that I haven't actually "cleaned" makes me a little nuts) so....thus, I quick run through. I need to go home and work on Friday (easy stuff, competencies and such) and then I promised my ex hubby that I would clean the house for the kiddies. It is my baby boy's 21st birthday on Sunday, so I imagine at midnight on Saturday night I will be buying him his first legal drink. That pretty much ensures that I won't be coming home until Sunday morning. I really don't have the time to do this, but it needs to be done. I am officially suspended from my job there until I complete the competencies, so that is a must! Anyway.....I am blabbing on....sorry.

Next weekend I go to do my presentation at Yale. This gives "the boy" 2 weekends without me. I wonder how he will guess, he will have a bunch of "boy" things going on and fully enjoy his time! That is not a bad thing!!

Ok, enough to dust.......etc......

Monday, July 07, 2008


This summer is full of research for me (among other things). I am working on two proposals, one is a pilot study that is in progress at the moment. That one is to test a survey tool being used in a larger study for clarity, reliability and validity as well as investigating how anxiety contributes to the use of emergent care in home care patients. This is not my particular field of interest, however I am an "expert" in home care patients and OASIS (which is a data set of outcomes that home care agencies are required to report to Medicare) so I am being "used" for this study, however it is helping me as well.

The other research proposal is my area of interest and it is the first step towards my dissertation. I will be presenting the proposal to the palliative care team at the Detroit VA later this month. I am hoping to conduct the study there. It is an investigation in regards to seriously ill or dying inpatients and their family and visitors and what type of spiritual/religious activities they seek out to help them cope with the present illness. Basically I am wanting to show that patients and their families do seek out spiritual/religious activities when they are ill and the health care system does not do all that they could to assist them with this coping measure. There are many definitions of "spiritual care" and "religious care" and it can sometimes be an uncomfortable subject for nurses to address with their patients. Holistic care addresses the entire person and when spiritual care is not addressed we are not providing good holistic care to our patients.

Research is difficult in that you have to take small baby steps to reach the final outcome. This means that you build on research, which is why this research project is a stepping stone to my dissertation, I need it as a base to show that this is important to patients, then I can begin looking at the outcomes of those patients who do receive spiritual care.....etc.

I am falling in love with research, even though it is tedious and time consuming. I love the organization of it and to see the results is really incredible. Good thing I love it, as that is basically what getting a PhD is about! At least I love SOMETHING about getting my PhD.......:o)

Sunday, July 06, 2008


My blog is so fricken boring! My apologies to those who view this regularly. I realize that I have gotten very stale. It seems that all of my "creativity is being sucked dry working on my writing projects. I really miss my art and how that stirred my creativity. I see no hope for changing that at this point. There is no time for me to melt glass, even if I had a studio set up. I feel as if I have gotten into some crazy rut that I can not pull out of. Relationships take tons of energy and that certainly has helped to stagnate me in some ways. (Not a bad thing, just a transitional thing) The one thing about "the boy" is that he is actually fairly social and much of what we do is with other people. It isn't that we have sucked into each other and the rest of the world has gone away, I have not however incorporated "my friends" into this relationship. Not for any reason in particular, more because I am simply going "along for the ride" so to speak. In some ways I feel a lack of direction. Being of a buddhist mindset, each day is what matters most, I think that I am taking that in a literal sense, and not necessarily looking to the future as much as I should be.

Ok, now I am rambling! I just feel as if there is so much more to say beyond "I am busy". There is so much more to life, there is so much that could/should be discussed. There is no question that working on my PhD has been THE most challenging thing I have ever done in my life. I am not afraid that I won't be successful in accomplishing it, I do wonder sometimes what the price of this is going to be in the long run. My desire to do this is altruistic in the sense that I hope to be an agent for change in how people who are seriously ill and dying are cared for in our country, but it is also entirely selfish in that I want my life to have meant something.

I suppose that is where this post originates from, what am I writing that will have meaning, that might touch others in a positive way? Right now, not a hell of a lot! I promise to be more thoughtful about what I post here, so those of you who do come to read, will get more than "Damn that girl bitches a lot!" :o)

Peace my friends.

Friday, July 04, 2008

Happy 4th!

I have been way out of touch for days now, as I have had no power for days. I just arrived back home and thankfully there is power, now it is time to weed through the email and get to work. My advisor called me at MIDNIGHT last night to tell me that she is scrapping my proposal and that I need to start over. (wtf?) Nice thoughts to go to bed to huh? Meh, part of it bothers me, on many different levels, and part of it, is like....oh well.....lets try this again!

Now.....I need to get cracking.


Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Michigan Marching Band

This is one of the reasons that I love going to the football games.......The Michigan Marching Band. This is from the 2007 season which means I actually saw this live ...... I am ready for football season to begin!


Credit for said video belongs Here

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Research Proposal

I am knee deep in writing a VERY lengthy research proposal that is long past due. I am making progress! Once I get that off to my advisor I will begin work on my second research proposal. The outline for that is due this weekend, I nearly have that outline developed so that part is a piece of cake, the proposal itself will be much more fun than this one, as the one that I am working on now isn't really my research interest and it is super complicated to write a research proposal for a pilot study of a research project that my advisor is the principal investigator for. My second research project is MY research interest and I am excited to be developing it. It will be the first step to my dissertation. How fun will that be to reference my OWN research article in MY dissertation!

My Father's health continues to decline. He had dialysis for the first time yesterday, after having his newly placed fistula not work, so they put in a central line to use until the fistula will work. He did get his letter from the UofM transplant team and he is officially on the donor list for a new kidney. "the boy" is calling today to find out if he can be tested as a match for my father. Pretty cool huh? My father's blood type is AB, so he is a universal recipient and will match any blood type. There are many other factors that need to be tested, so we are not getting our hopes up that he will be a match, but it is very cool that he would even be tested.

Things smoothed out with "the boy" and are going along even better than before. The little bump was a good thing, just to help us learn how to "be" with each other.

Now, I need to FOCUS and finish this proposal so that I may have this monster off my plate! :o)

Peace Out!