Saturday, April 17, 2010

I should expect it!

I should expect it, this "let down" feeling after sweating blood over course work and now it is nearly finished (one paper and 2 classes to show up for on Monday). It seems to me that I should feel ecstasy and all I am is totally grumpy. I think that maybe part of it is the proposal for my dissertation won't have any feedback on it for about 10 days, and I just wanted to know NOW that it was a great piece of work. The other part is, the apartment is a disaster zone (although Dave has tried so hard to keep it basically clean) but there are just things that I do, that he doesn't notice or even know to do. There seems to be no break yet. I didn't get my season tickets for the football season (no money), My car lease was due last Wednesday, so I look out of the window every moment to be sure it isn't being hauled off. I need to call and ask for a month extension. The job is great, except it is going to take me at least a month to get everything caught up. This degree has ruined my credit, so I will have to beg my bank to loan me the money for the buy out on my car. I owe money to people, I need to get my tickets and room for Chrystal's wedding, I need to get a dress for her wedding, I need to HELP her with her wedding..............on and on I could go. I guess it is just everything that I couldn't let myself be too concerned about during the term, that is still there now that the term is nearly over. I hope to goodness that I get a full time job at this place. The VP is taking me to dinner to discuss it next week. Although, I worked for 9 hours yesterday and basically spoke to no one. I am not sure that my fellow employees like me all that much, but then again, I am writing an infection control plan (I wrote nearly 20 policies yesterday) so I am not running around being social. I just hear everyone talking and laughing and think, will I fit in? I need to remember I am really super grumpy right now! I think I just needed to say all of that. So if you read it. I am so sorry!!!! Today, I won't go to the Spring game, I will try to get this place in shape, call Toyota, pay some bills and go to the laundromat. I also will go to the bead shop to get a cabochon for the necklace that I am making for Chrystal's wedding (yes, I am making her jewelry). That will be a fun thing today! Dave and I had a melt down last night, so hopefully there is no tension today (he is off work today). Guess I better get to it!

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